By Dr. Tom Barnette
A Question to Consider: Why do so many people get stuck in a ditch and not seem to be able to climb out to save their life?
Well, technology came first, but man, being naturally lazy, invented ditch technology.
Ditches are always built by man to redirect the flow of water. Do not confuse natural running water with manmade ditches. Manmade ditches rise and fall with rain and water runoff. All ditches collect trash and debris. Ditches are full of runoff pollution and everything from insecticides to motor oil. No homeowner ever looked at a drainage ditch and said, "How beautiful! Please landscape my yard with a ditch."
In fact, drainage ditches come with a warning. The water in a ditch can move so fast it will suck you under. Ditches are things you can fall into and get stuck. James, a recovering alcoholic and Christian friend, said his goal when he would drive drunk was to, "keep it between the ditches." Even drunks know to avoid the ditches.
The ditch will not completely drain, and the water that is left becomes stagnant. It grows a healthy crop of mosquitoes. The ditch water kills the grass under the water and leaves smelly slime mixed with trash. Foolish parents let their children play in the filthy, open ditch. Some children are warned to stay out of the ditch because it can be dangerous, and sometimes they rebel and play in it anyway. They play with makeshift paper boats and run up and down the ditch. Then they return home like the little prodigal children: cold, wet, and sick.
For centuries, the idea was that ditch digging was not something to aspire to. This was the back-breaking work reserved for slaves or prisoners. In Luke 16:2-4, Jesus tells of a man who had come to the end of his rope, "He called the manager and asked him, ‘What is this I hear about you? Tell me what you have done. You cannot be my manager any longer.' Then the manager thought to himself, ‘What will I do? My master is taking my work away from me. I am not strong enough to go out and dig a ditch. I am ashamed to beg.'"
Even the most sinful do not want to live in a ditch! So why do so many people fall in the life's ditches and not climb back out? Why would anyone be satisfied being stuck in a ditch? The reality is that they are not happy stuck in the ditch. Ask a smoker how many times they have tried to quit. Question the overweight person how many diets they have tried and failed. Ditches come in all forms, shapes, and sizes. They all have the same characteristics and will show up at different times and places. Because ditch dwelling people are selfish, they pull others into the ditch with them. Ditches are never prejudiced; they will accept anyone who falls into their muck.
In Matthew 15:15, Jesus said, "They are blind men who are trying to lead blind men. If a blind man leads a blind man, they will both fall into a ditch."
Falling into the ditch is the easy part - getting out is the hard part. The walls are steep and the slime is slippery. Many just choose to stay in the ditch. The larger the ditch, the more help we need getting out of the ditch. Sometimes you need a tow truck to pull your car out of the ditch. For example, if yelling at the kids would make them perfect, then all parents would have perfect kids. Ask yourself, "What is the purpose in training children?" Is it for the parent's sake or the children's need? The answer is, "Both."
Children need to learn to function in a family system. A family needs the children to function in the system. Children are not born with this knowledge. They only have needs, so they must learn. And you cannot teach them anything if you are stuck in a ditch. The child's need for discipline and knowledge are not met, thus they will turn to abnormal wants to fulfill their needs.
The jet liner is going down and the oxygen masks deploy. Do you put your own mask on first or the child's? The correct answer is you put your own mask on first! If you pass out before you put the child's mask on, you both will die. If you put yours on first, then you can save the child and yourself. You might also save the other dumb parents who tried putting their child's mask on first.
You can't fix your family until you fix yourself. Individuals, families, and children fall into ruts, or a small, manageable ditch. Another term for a rut is redundancy, i.e. having the same stupid argument over the same stupid thing over and over again.
Remember, a life rut is always man-made. The rut in your life is abnormal, and over time it will become a ditch. Every person needs help getting out of the man-made ruts of life from time to time. It is easier to get out of a rut than a ditch. The deeper the rut, the harder it is to climb out. If a man is drowning in quicksand, you do not jump in with him in order to save him! You toss him a life line and tell the drowning man to tie it around his body. Then you will have to keep pulling until the suction of the quicksand begins to let go. As you begin to pull the person out, you will see hope return to their eyes. You need to keep pulling because the closer to the edge they get, the more they will help themselves. Soon they are out of the quicksand pit, but now they need to be cleaned up. Once out of the quicksand ditch, they have to go through the cleaning process alone. No one can clean you better than you can clean yourself. Sometimes you need a long, hot bath to get all the dirt off.
The lifeline that pulls you out of the ditch is the plan for success coupled with the act of working the plan. It is hard work pulling someone out of quicksand; do not give up (resolution)! They may not move at first, but the longer and harder you pull, the closer they are to salvation (permanency).
Ditches are always made by man and filled with trash. All graves on earth are man-made. God did not dig a hole for our dead bodies; only men dig graves. The only grave that God was ever placed in was man-made, and Jesus got up and walked right out of it. Man-made ditches cannot contain God's power.
The great Baptist preacher, Charles Spurgeon, has an illustration that aligns with ruts and ditches. To paraphrase:
"Suppose a house is attacked by seven thieves. The good man of the house is armed and kills six of the thieves. One thief survives. Then the good man of the house allows the thief to live in his home. The good man indulges the thief and pampers him. The thief steals the goods of the home and takes advantage of the man's children and wife. Yet, the good man allows the thief to still live in his home. Finally, the thieve kills the good man and destroys his family. If by the grace of God you have driven out six of these vices and yet one still lives, you will still lose everything."
The rut became a ditch, and the man indulged and pampered the ditch. When the raging water filled the ditch, it took the man's family, then his life.
Many years ago I was working at a residential mental health hospital. I was finishing my work on my Master's degree at the time, and I worked on the adolescent unit. Many of the teens were placed there by the court, especially if they were picked up on the streets. Most of the young men were drug addicts and prostitutes. They were easy targets for adults with access to drugs and money. These young men came in with a list of diseases from AIDS and hepatitis to tuberculosis; some had all three. The adolescent unit was on the second floor of the hospital. One morning I walked out the doors around 6:00 a.m., heading toward the elevators just as two EMTs were walking off with a teenage boy from the streets. I stopped to offer assistance because it was apparent the young man was still under the influence.
It was at that moment that the young man had a violent seizure and fell to the reception area floor. He began to vomit and shake. I held the teen's feet as he had a grand mal seizure, and he began to choke on his own vomit. Without any hesitation, the medic put his mouth on the teen's mouth and sucked out the vomit. He did this over and over again until the young man could breath on his own. Knowledge and action are not the same thing. The young EMT was a husband and father of two small children, and he was fully aware of the dangers. He knew the probable diseases the street teenager might have, and the personal risk involved with mouth-to-mouth. He also knew that the boy would die in seconds if the vomit reached his lungs. The heroic act I witnessed that morning has haunted me for years. I often wonder if I would have the commitment to follow through with such an act of raw heroism.
When Jesus was crucified, He sucked all the vomit of sin out of our lives. He gave His life so that we could truly live. Then He walked out of a man-made grave to show us that it's possible. All we have to do is follow in His footsteps.
